self

(Gel Fineliner on A5 Paper) A piece for Inktober, but one which references the way some artists self-censor so as not to offend anyone.

I was feeling listless about this inktober until I picked up Daily Rituals : How artists work by Mason Currey. I immediately knew that I want to do these portraits for the inktober. FRANCIS BACON. At the end of these long nights, Bacon frequently demanded that his reeling companions join him at home for one last drink - an effort, it seems, to postpone his nightly battles with insomnia. Bacon depended on polls to get to sleep, and he would read and reread classic cookbooks to relax himself before bed. #inktober #portraits #francisBacon

my memory is my recent character i made so far inspired by serial experiment lain. my memory is partially self projection. a computer scientist who lost a student he was close with and saw them as their own spent 20 years creating a new project to commemorate his former student, emory. after 20 years, the project was a success, a humanoid machine has emory's memories stored in her and everything feels like deja vu for my memory. a confused and curious my memory must learn to function in society as a robot.

The concept for this painting started as a design for a pumpkin carving contest. I felt the message of the design is so important for people to hear, I decided to make it into a painting. The original design, done in pen and ink. The design only shows the two doors of the entrance to a fortress. I tried to keep the design simple, because the carving event is both timed and live. You must create your masterpiece on the pumpkin they provide, on their location, Infront of live spectators. The evolution of the design? I added a wall on each side of the entrance, with matching pillars. Explaining the design of the pillars The triangle top: the triune God. Representing three persons of God: Father, Son, Holy Spirit. The cross shape opening in the pillars: The cross is the only path to God, to have the debt of sin satisfied. To reconcile humankind back to himself. To be released from being a slave to the Devil. To be a new creation empowered by God Spirit. Explaining the design of the entrance way(gate) The top of the entrance is in the shape of a heart, represents the seat of human passion, ambition, and allegiance. The cultic three petal flower is used to represent God in three persons united. The symbol inside the flower: God’s ministry toward humankind. Crown: Highest authority Cross: God’s loving salvation and restoration plan. The dove: Spiritualty made alive, fellowship with God, empowerment to weather the storm of life, and equip for service to God. Change in the design of the door. In the original design, one door had roses carved on it. The pattern took up the whole door. The other door had a grape vine carved on it. The pattern took up the whole door. I modified the emblem on the doors by making them smaller and simplified, so I could place them inside heart shapes, so the new images would more clearly communicate what they are meant to represent. I also added color to the emblems (color pencil) to make them clear of what they are, because of their size and the ink medium ,they were hard to interpret. Understanding the symbol of the two doors. The door with the rose inside the heart emblem represents a heart whose passions, ambitiousness, allegiance are focused on the cares, worries, and abstaining riches of the world. Only giving God lip service. I chose the rose to represent the heart of spiritual allegiance to the world, because roses are pretty, but you can’t eat them to nourish your body. They also have thorns that can cause injury to the body. So, the parallel point is, just as flower fade and turn to dust, so will the person who chases the thing of the world and has no time for God. For life is very short, we know not which will be our last breath on this side of eternity. But if a person leaves this earth without excepting the gift God offered them which is salvation from penalty of sin and given enteral life through the work that was done on the cross by God’s son. Then that soul will appear before Jesus, and just as they did not know him in their life on earth, He will tell them he knows them not. Into the lake of fire, they will spend eternity. The door with the grape vine in the heart emblem represents a heart whose passions, ambitiousness, allegiance are for God. To know Him intimately, to obey His teachings, to serve his will. I chose the grapevine to represent the heart of spiritual allegiance to God, because grapes are nourishing to the body. Jesus also used a grape vine in one of his parables. He paralleled the spiritual relationship he had with his disciples and the grapevine. He told them just as branches of a vine must depend on the base of the vine to live and bare fruit, so they must abide him to have abundant life. Abiding in Christ is not a religious act. It is outside of religion. It is an intimate relationship. Example: you can belong to a fan club of Paul McCartney and know a lot of things you have heard about him, but he doesn’t even know you exist. Where, if Paul is your father, and you have a good parent to child relationship, then you know him intimately. So, abiding in God, we commune with him through read his word and living by its teachings. It is spending time in prayer. Sharing our hearts with God and spending time listing to him. Trusting in him as our provider and giving thanks for his provision. Living our lives, with the purpose of pleasing him with the work of our hand and loving our neighbors in the workplace as well as in the community. Just as a healthy grapevine continues to grow and produce much fruit. Having an imitate relationship with God should be more and more evident in the way we live our lives. So, when the angel of death pays you an unexpected visit, he escorts you to Jesus’s throne, you know for certain he going to welcome you with loving arms and said welcome home my faithful servant. Now to which door I chose for my life? It’s the one that is open. This bible verse one of a couple that inspired me to design this illustration. 1 Corinthians 3:12-13 King James Version 12 Now if any man builds upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble. 13 Every man's work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is. This verse is not referring to the rebellious people who have rejected God, this is referring to people who are children of God, who failed to serve God faithful. Written by Stephen J. Vattimo. 3 Jan 2024 Evolution of the design of this painting. I believe God through His Holy Spirit guided me to change the crosses on the two pillars, one on each side of the doors. Instead of these windows being fill with darkness, which would represent death by crucifixion, which Jesus endured for humanity, that who so ever is willing may be delivered from the power of sin and be adopted by God to become a member of His family. I was inspired to put light in both cross windows. The cross window on the side the open door, with the grape vines on it, the light matches the color of the light that is coming out the windows of Icons shapes representing the ministry of tri union God. The color I used is a bright firry orang yellowing color. For the bible says God is a consuming fire. The cross windows on the side of door with the flower on it, I used the color greenish yellow lite; to represent a false light, the bible call it a form of Godliness without power. Who so ever tries to approach God another way, than the path God has ordained. They will not be received. The Devil distorts the truth, to lead many to their demise. The only way to know the difference between truth and fallacy, is to study God’s word. Written by Stephen J. Vattimo August 7,2024

A homage to Michelangelo's "Creation of Adam", in which Christ, the second Adam, emptied himself of His divine stature, and took the form of a lowly servant, enduring the shame of the cross (Philippians 2:6-8), so that He may redeem His bride, the church. Further references: Ezekiel 16:8, Isaiah 6:10, 1 John 4:10

I find myself working on perspective and that what came out.

#embracingnightmares - im getting these selfies down pretty good now i think

Happy Earth Day! Today we should reflect on at least one thing we love about our planet. Is it your favorite place in nature to visit? Your favorite animal? A favorite memory from childhood? Now the next step to ask yourself is what part am I playing to preserve our earth? All it takes is one action from you to make a difference. Collectively we will make a difference.

Suddenly the light goes out and staying in the dark is a test of resistance, but when everything seems lost, it turns on again, so simply: sometimes a single attempt isn't enough, there are many moments to spend without light, but you don't have to be afraid of it, because sooner or later we will succeed in the undertaking and it will make you smile as the thing that seemed so difficult came spontaneously, it was enough not to force the process. I hate the darkness because it shows me a version of myself that I would never want to meet, yet if I accept that the punches of life in some periods are stronger than others, sometimes leaving bruises and burns, but that life itself has granted me caresses like this sweets that I would not have appreciated without going through pain, then everything around me will seem golden. I can only appreciate the hatred and wonder of it. I can feel those caresses, I can savor them with the same intensity with which I feel the pain of the punches, because ultimately they give so much: the strength to take another step, to not give up right now, right now that I am so close to feeling them in my heart those precious caresses.

Hourly comic day. Every year I swear to myself that I will do the Hourly comic day on February 1. Every year I fail to do it. This year I even added it to my calendar. And still... The hours run away from me and then I think to myself - who wants to know the hours of my day. And I think to myself - nobody. So I don't. Maybe next year.

Luminary Festival - Auren Farkis (Digital Portrait I did as a colour study) Crisp reverberating strings danced through the evening. Notes twisted and echoed up through the emerald, velvet tiers of Ridgedow Gardens. Dusk’s veil had long since darkened to a diamond-encrusted black, and Clarglow was alive with activity. Footpaths were choked with revellers that formed a river of light that coursed and pulsed through the park. Will-o-whisp spots of light also glowed among the neatly trimmed hedgerows and statues. Their magic-addled voices rose up, joining in with the music of the Luminary Festival. A young man, no more than a quarter of a century old, glowed brightest of all. A soft orange radiated from his eyes, and his veins pulsed a brilliant red. He was dripping in gold and gems. Over an outfit that somehow managed to be heavily layered and revealing at the same time, he wore a sheer cape, which was heavily embroidered with blood-red crystals that refracted his own light around him in dazzling, concentrated rays. It was such a dangerous colour of magic, but his expression was soft and dreamy. Excited laughter rose up as a clustered group shot metallic confetti skyward. Gold flake drifted down and settled into his silver hair, cheeks, and shoulders. No doubt he would discover the remnants of this festival in his home weeks from now. He increased his pace, stepping off the cobbled path to overtake the group, when one of their number split from the group. The coils of her dark hair were so saturated with gold that she looked like she belonged on a pedestal next to the other statues. She intercepted him, matching his pace. She snaked a long, slender arm around his waist and pulled him closer. She pressed her lips against his neck, leaving a wake of golden kisses up to his earlobe, where she leaned closer to whisper. — “Aurie, Luv, I know that look. Don’t tell me you’re headed home. The eve has only just begun. “ Her glowing eyes Locked with Auren’s, her grip tightening, slowing the both of them to a stop, causing a temporary blockage in the flow of people. “Overdid myself Mel.. you’ll have to –” –” Come with us to the reflecting pool.” She cooed, meeting his lips in an off-center kiss, smearing his inky wine lipstick. Momentarily, he allowed himself to relax. He considered saying yes. His heart pounding, he dipped his friend backwards gracefully, resenting that he had to leave. An itch in his left arm reminded his fuzzy brain that he was in danger. Gasping softly, he gently lifted Mella upright and spun her out towards her friends, who were growing impatient. He couldn’t make out their faces in the fuzz of the evening. “I can’t, I’m sorry Mel! We’ll talk later.” Before she could protest, he danced, spinning forward in a brilliant display of speed that ended in a stumble as he met a set of steep steps that coiled sharply upwards out of the park and onto the pink brick streets overlooking Ridgedow Gardens. The glazed windows facing the street were empty and blank… their occupants elsewhere, enjoying the festival. The empty buildings were like faces, judging him for his lack of zeal. Auren wound his way through streets and side streets, his pace increasing as he grew more and more alone. Finally, he was climbing a set of steps to his own front door. Smirking at the sight of it he reached down into the front of the bodice that held together the layers of his outfit pulling free a loop of keys that were on a long chain looped around his neck. Aligning it to the keyhole he struggled with the lock, cursing softly under his breath as it initially failed to cooperate with him. In the quiet black of his foyer, he latched the door behind him and stumbled forward, tearing at the ribbon that held the gleaming cape that draped from his bare shoulders. He let it drop on a black lacquered table. He reached up to unclasp an elaborate choker and tore his single, crimson glove down from his elbow. He pressed a gilded fingernail against a band of red ink encroached upon by a spreading corruption. Marginally extending beyond the band were sinews of mismatched muscle and skin; even his hair had begun to glow red. Pulse rising, he wrenched his rings from his fingers, casting them into the ever-darkening room. Precious jewellery piled under him until only the dimmest glow from his own veins remained.. Slumping onto the steps, he tightened his grip on his arm and twisted it ninety degrees. A sharp click of crystal against porcelain met his ears. The room was enveloped in black as his final stone slid away from his arm, rendering the prosthesis inert. He slid to his side, the sounds of the party below overtaken by his own gasping breaths, panic refusing to subside alongside his magic.

“Self destruction is what it takes to make change.”

This study is for an upcoming painting about the life of Christ. The drawing itself took about two weeks’ time of working on it off and on. The research stage took about two months. This study is attempting to capture the spirit of being out on the water, walking with Jesus during a storm on the sea of Galilee. I hope the viewer can feel Peter’s anxiety as he is sinking into the lake as a fierce storm drains Peter’s faith in his ability to walk on water through the ability the Lord gave him. I wanted to show how compassionate Jesus is to quickly crouch down to rescue Peter from drowning and get him back to the safety of the boat with the rest of the disciples, which is outside of the illustration. Some people feel that I should have Jesus’s feet visible above the water so people don’t get the notion that Jesus is sinking in the water too. But if I’d done that, it would have altered what it would really look like in the natural world, because even if Jesus’s feet were on top of the water, this might not be visible to the viewer because the waves in front of Jesus might block the view of his feet. This illustration makes me think about trying to accomplish a task that the Lord has called us to do by depending on our own strength instead of the strength of the Holy Spirit. Then we find ourselves sinking instead of making headway, and we must call on the Lord to rescue us and put us back on the right track. (September 22, 2015

28 DEC 2023

Cauldrene's friend Spooker finds himself in scary trouble.

Well here we are. At the end of my Mugman Halloween comic. Or is it? MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! But seriously, this is the end of the comic itself.

Dare to join this devious dinner? Melvin, Marigold, Morgana and Murial invite you to an evening filled with deathly excitement. Come and splurge on poisoned candied apples (which far outshine the pathetic apples of the evil queen), dragon roasted bone marrow, the most delicious pumpkin pies, chicken feed pot pies (a family recipe from the famous Baba Yaga herself), or a sinful devil's food cake (thank you, Uncle Mephistopheles). Maybe, my dear friend, a glass of wine or a vial of fresh, still warm blood will help to wash away all your doubts if to join or not- because what bad can happen with this splendid array of company nestled between the most beautiful blooming wisterias? Don´t be afraid! They don´t bite - at least not all of them.

Inktober Day 2(Spiders) Year 2 I like how this one came out but I always tell myself I could do better

Self portrait

19 JUL 2023

Coloured drawing pens

When one day ends another starts, don't allow yourself to think about the day when it's the end, because, at the beginning of tomorrow, there is always a start.

Finished scribbly self portrait...unless I decide to paint it, that is.

Yet another self portrait. Whenever I am questioning my artistic abilities, I draw a self portrait to remind myself that I can draw but that I just need to familiarise myself with the subject matter.

segments , steps, blindfolded, a difference of language between the body and something subtle , lack of movement.click -switch! the union of body and soul , the disappearance of the blindfold from the eyes and the flight between the immensely endless bright layers of fields .I am very curious about the sophisticated nature of things and phenomena: myself, people the Universe, I like to consider and feel them like a multi-layered cake, where each layer has its own history, worldview, and even its own temperature. I love to listen lectures of charismatic lovers of philosophy, design, music, human psychology and I enjoy the excitement it brings and the birth of new layers inside me. I rarely manage to silence my inner critic and for many years I have been learning how to be able to do it productively. I am still in the process though. I treat my life as a long voyage, changing directions and yes - sometimes those around me. I understand that even 24 hours a day is not enough and I definitely realize that my life today is much more colorful and interesting than when I was 20 years old.

Hb2 6b pencils,tortillion blending stump, 68lb paper. Freehand doodle.

Like her name,she's sour but she's more angry than glum,I really don't like how her dress turned out but I really couldn't try anything else since I'm drawing with my finger again.. hopefully I'll redesign the dress soon and use less orange.Duchess RavenWaves is my inspiration for her.She is a purple licorice princess albeit evil (you know how a lot of people hate licorice?) Instead of having simple sweet candy decorations on her dress she has candy corn decorations (no one likes candy corn) she is really bitter,evil, selfish and ruthless often enslaving many candy people with her father who works as her advisor.her wand isn't alive like Sweetnette's wand it still has powerful magic like Sweetnette,she has to dance and sing to transform, there's a jester form and a military leader form.she is taller and thin,and has a circular face in contrast to Sweetnette's square face.she often uses demonic magic,which sometimes backfires.

We try to drown out the little voice in our head that tells us that we're not good enough or that everyone thinks that we are imposters. It's often the self doubt that rings louder than reason and truth.

So I guess I had a Doodle addicts account!? Well I'm going to give it a whirl and see how it goes. He is my sample of my art. This is a portrait I drew of myself. Yes my forehead is that big lol.