"And I Can't Get It Out of My Head"
Watercolor
I feel like I may be cheating since the song I was inspired by is not so simple, but I'm pleased with the result. To be completely honest, this was the piece I needed right now.
The past week has been interesting for me, I've found myself in a peculiar slump. There's not one thing I'm thinking or worrying about, it's a constant buzz of thoughts streaming through my head. Sometimes I can get the buzzing to quiet down, other times it gets overwhelmingly loud.
I've always found art to be a release, it fills in the blanks when I can't figure out how to make my words work. Lately, it's been more of a challenge than usual, but I think this piece says all I've been wanting to say.
Often times my work is more about a conversation with my anxieties. I have a deep, conflicting relationship with concepts of existentialism. The following works reflect abstract ideas that I simply don’t have words for.
People have thrown terrible words at me, but since then I’ve grown. They don’t affect me anymore but they did. I want everyone else out there, who suffers from bullies or hate in anyway to know; you are good enough, and you are beautiful. There are people who do love you, even if you’re not sure.
It's crazy to think that 6 years have already flown by since I first moved onto the Xcel gymnastics team, let alone the fact that I've spent 15 years of my life as a gymnast. Tomorrow, August 6th, 2021, marks my last day as a gymnast on the team since I'm officially a college student. I've genuinely been dreading this day, but it's not the ending I expected...in an oddly good way. I know no one expected to spend the past year in a pandemic, and I definitely didn't think gym would shift so much in the following months, but here we are. Gymnastics has taught me more than I ever imagined it could, and my coaches (especially one of them) have become two of the people I'm closest with, words can't describe how grateful I am for everything. This 'ending' doesn't feel like an end, more so a closing to this chapter. Honestly, my love for the sport has only grown, and it feels like I'm finally figuring it all out. So, although my final practice as a team member is tomorrow, my journey is not over yet. "Goodbyes are the hardest part, and this ending has been something I’ve been dreading, although I know it’s time to let go. I’d like to say this isn’t a permanent goodbye to you or the sport, it’s more of a natural conclusion. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you’ve done for me and managed to teach me in this short amount of time, I couldn’t have asked for anyone, or anything, better. Thank you most of all for helping me achieve my dreams and for helping me get to a point in which I can say I’m proud of my journey.
All that’s left to say is I care about you, I love you, and take care."
"Untitled," 8×10, Scratchboard: I think it's become evident that I enjoy making portraits no matter what the medium is. I still find it fascinating how much eyes can say, and they can usually fill in the gaps where words fail. I took a chance using Scratchboard, but I think it worked out, I'm pleased with it. I suppose this is a new member of the Black and White Portrait Club :)
Ballpoint pen and Stabilos; this took longer than it should've. I think it turned out pretty nicely, but the coloring isn't the best (my pens started running out of ink). "I reject your reality and substitute my own"- Adam Savage
THE BOOK from Stories for Nighttime and Some for the Day by Ben Loory.
"THE WOMAN RETURNS FROM THE STORE WITH AN armload of books. She reads them quickly, one by one, over the course of the next few weeks. But when she opens the last one, the woman frowns in surprise. All the pages in the book are blank. Every single one. The woman takes the book back to the store, but the manager won’t let her return it. Right there on the cover, the manager says, This book has no words and is non-returnable."
https://www.instagram.com/p/Cf61DnhO1NL/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link
Stream of consciousness portrait. Just for fun and... to use of old markers and pens that have been lying around forever. In other words, getting rid of old materials.
Whew!!! About 50 hours of work split evenly over line work and color. I think it’s finished ( famous last words)! I’ll check on it again in a few days for any final details... and get some good camera shots instead of phone camera. .... but I’m happy!
Dismal.
Another one of my favorite words. And incidentally, I am so good at drawing dogs. Dismally good.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CrlUREQudDf/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link
Swimmingly is such a good word!
I personally swim like a brick, so usually try not to describe things in my life as such.
Inspired by a photograph by a photograph by Michael Carlebach.
https://www.instagram.com/p/Cqk3W01uzUv/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link
This was my first digital portrait for a book cover I did for my brother. you can see the book cover image here https://www.amazon.com/Gus-Graham-Arizona-Sheriff-Winkies-ebook/dp/B071H3S5NW/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2FT2WWGZ0IG1M&keywords=winkies+escape&qid=1641839447&s=digital-text&sprefix=winkies+escape%2Cdigital-text%2C65&sr=1-1
Project for my health class. It's supposed to be a fingerprint, and the words written in are all postitive things, whether they are quotes or things I like. Thought this would be fitting for the "doodle" aspect. Drawn with FireAlpaca.
Fun with gouache! While I was painting this, I learned that "scumble"/"scumbling" are words used to describe the action of dry brush painting, so my detective's name is Scumbles.
Words on the watercolor are from Vincent van Gogh's letter to Theo van Gogh (Cuesmes, July 1880). Neal ran away only to discover that all that he was running away from is still with him.
It’s easier to remain silent for someone
whose words only ever got twisted.
(spoke in other forms though)
Running from what?
Nothing. And everything.
Until they fell off the edge - or flew-
and plunged into an epiphany where words can’t
even translate,
can’t touch you.
“Don’t you come looking for me”
on the wind.
A collage made of scraps of cardboard, toothpicks, and words. The "frame" is also made from corrugated cardboard, spray painted. A fun project made from discards.
Catty corner or kitty corner or also cater cornered.
Such a weird expression that today I learned is to be identified with obsolete cater “four”, from Middle French quatre.
Favorite words.
https://www.instagram.com/p/Cq8Dw2QO_Vr/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link