Side Face Portrait Drawing by Oz Galeano
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I think we all have been there. Its not that I don't like socializing, but I have anxiety when I'm placed in a large group of people. But once I get to know ya, its smooth sailing from there.
Se riesco ad accettare che il mio mondo interiore può essere estremamente vulnerabile e che forse posso cadere mille volte, in cui mi sembra di essermi dimenticata tutto quello che ho imparato, ma altrettante sono le volte in cui ci provo, allora del fallimento poco importa. È solo una salita, e abbassando le aspettative verso la presunta performance che dovrei avere, posso perdonarmi anche quando proprio non vorrei, anche quando tutto quello che detesto di me viene a galla, anche quando cado troppe volte nelle stesse buche, quando penso troppo e la mente diventa un groviglio confuso dal quale vorrei scappare, quando mi deprimo troppo e respirare sembra insostenibile, quando perdo ogni speranza nella mia capacità di vincere le crisi, quando vorrei piangere, ma mi dimentico come si fa.
Sketch today, cleanup and color tomorrow? Translating Jim Henson's crazy detailed puppets from the Dark Crystal into what I feel would be an appropriate illustrative style for 2D was a lot of fun, and I might fiddle around more with it. Character is an OC Skeksis with the title of Therapist/Psychologist, so the little designs on his jacket are supposed to represent neuron synapses and the back... thing (which you can't see from this angle) would look like a brain.
Suddenly the light goes out and staying in the dark is a test of resistance, but when everything seems lost, it turns on again, so simply: sometimes a single attempt isn't enough, there are many moments to spend without light, but you don't have to be afraid of it, because sooner or later we will succeed in the undertaking and it will make you smile as the thing that seemed so difficult came spontaneously, it was enough not to force the process.
I hate the darkness because it shows me a version of myself that I would never want to meet, yet if I accept that the punches of life in some periods are stronger than others, sometimes leaving bruises and burns, but that life itself has granted me caresses like this sweets that I would not have appreciated without going through pain, then everything around me will seem golden. I can only appreciate the hatred and wonder of it.
I can feel those caresses, I can savor them with the same intensity with which I feel the pain of the punches, because ultimately they give so much: the strength to take another step, to not give up right now, right now that I am so close to feeling them in my heart those precious caresses.
